There is a site called Leilah’s Laughs that has lots of good dog humor and poems, here are some of my favs:
Poem for new puppy owners:
Poem for New Puppy Owners
Posted on Acme Pet by Bravehart on October 10, 1998 at 11:25:22:
Don’t smell crotches, don’t eat plants,
Don’t steal food or underpants.
Don’t eat my socks; don’t grab my hair,,,
DON’T RIP THE STUFFING FROM THAT CHAIR!!
Don’t eat those peas, don’t touch that bush,
Don’t chew my shoes, what IS this mush!?!
Eat your cookies, drink your drink,
Outta the toilet! Outta the sink!
AWAY FROM THE LITER BOX, IT’S FOR THE CAT!
(and must you kiss me after that!?!)
Raising a puppy is not for the lazy,
Those rugrats are funny, but also quite crazy.
Don’t despair through the toil and the strife.
“Cause after three years you’ll get back your life!
So lets go for walkies, so you can do your “thing”
And maybe I’ll get back my diamond ring!
-Author unknown
The 12 days of christmas puppy style:
A Puppy’s 12 Days of Christmas
(Be sure to read down to Day 12)
On the first day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
The Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the second day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the third day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the fourth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the fifth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Five chewed-up stockings
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the sixth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Six yards of soggy ribbon
Five chewed-up stockings
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the seventh day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Seven scraps of wrapping paper
Six yards of soggy ribbon
Five chewed-up stockings
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the eighth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Eight tiny reindeer fragments
Seven scraps of wrapping paper
Six yards of soggy ribbon
Five chewed-up stockings
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the ninth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
My wreath in nine pieces
Eight tiny reindeer fragments
Seven scraps of wrapping paper
Six yards of soggy ribbon
Five chewed-up stockings
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the tenth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Ten Christmas cards I shoulda mailed
My wreath in nine pieces
Eight tiny reindeer fragments
Seven scraps of wrapping paper
Six yards of soggy ribbon
Five chewed-up stockings
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the eleventh day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
Eleven unwrapped presents
Ten Christmas cards I shoulda mailed
My wreath in nine pieces
Eight tiny reindeer fragments
Seven scraps of wrapping paper
Six yards of soggy ribbon
Five chewed-up stockings
Four broken window candles
Three punctured ornaments
Two leaking bubble lights
And the Santa topper from the Christmas tree.
On the twelfth day of Christmas my puppy gave to me
A dozen puppy kisses
And I forgot all about the other eleven days.
Here is the link to the site(warning: some of the jokes are not kid appropriate, so don’t show to kids without reading first): http://www.wonderpuppy.net/1lists.php
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